T265 was just given an impossible choice, betray the first person to show her kindness in years or be sent back to the Califax Ranch with a target on her back. At least siding with the Warden to his face kept her safe a little while longer.
The half-moon in the sky illuminated the rooftop of G barracks as the hum of the air conditioning units filled the air. EmCee sat at the head of the group in silence as Kiddo sang a mournful songthat held ideals and hope of a nation.
One that abandoned the poor, huddled masses some time ago in favor of demagogues and pundits. Now, it hung by a thread for dear life. Sir and Slick hummed the melody while Boy beat the percussion onto her lap. Kiddo’s voice rose just above the hum, but its dulcet sound filled T265 and gave a respite from the horror of the day.
T265 struggled to push aside the warden’s words and what he asked of her. While she had no intense connection to any of the women on that rooftop, it was difficult to rationalize betrayal. However, her survival in that hell was at stake, and having the warden as an ally could benefit her. Runt sat on the boundary of the group with her and T113’s words came back to her.
There were no friends here.
That lesson kept T265 safe for five years, but after spending time with EmCee she questioned if that was who she wanted to be. Even with the horrific violation she endured, the feeling she captured on that rooftop at sunrise refused to be extinguished.
Kiddo finished the last notes of the song, and the residual hum of machines reasserted its dominance. The rest of the women clapped their hands, and EmCee patted her on the back.
“Divine Kiddo. Absolutely divine,” EmCee cooed and her warm gaze landed on T265. “Sport, why don’t you share what you discovered this morning?”
T265 shook her head. “What are we really doing here?” she asked. “What did you mean when you said ‘welcome to stonewall’?”
“This is Stonewall, all of us, here, celebrating each other,” EmCee explained in a way that tried to make it seem obvious.
“Stonewall was a violent riot,” T265 said. “If this is Stonewall, where are the Gs?”
“We can only set the table, they choose if they attend,” EmCee spoke with tenderness that reminded T265 of her mother. “In the face of oppression, our joy is revolting, the warden sure thinks so.” Something hid in her voice that gave T265 pause.
“So this is protest to you?”
“It’s a start, what you wrote could be the spark we need.”
“They’re just words EmCee. Just words.”
“So was the Declaration of Independence and Dr. King’s speech, until they were more,” EmCee whispered. “Those words you captured changed something. I felt that when I read them and I saw you, the real you.” She sat on her knees. “It was hope Sport. Somehow in the deep of this shit, you discovered hope.”
“Sometimes they are just words EmCee,” T265 responded.
“Read them.”
The anxiety enveloped T265 like an old friend, that familiar knot in her stomach that reminded her of simpler times. One more deep breath and she exhaled each word from where it was burned into her memory.
With each line and stanza, her body woke up as passion coiled within to infuse each syllable with the power she felt that morning. The thump in her chest grew in intensity as the nodding heads of Sir and Slick hastened the crescendo.
The intoxication of their rapt attention sent her into a frenzy that tore open the box she hid in for so many years.
The air hung silent after the last words danced from her lips, but T265’s body wasn’t finished. It craved more and the long restrained creative force became a torrent of ideas in her mind that begged to satiate. She stood still as no one moved for several minutes until Sir wiped her eyes.
“God I missed this feeling,” she whispered.
EmCee clapped her hands in a slow and steady rhythm and the others followed suit for a couple minutes until they died down.
“What are you thinking?” EmCee asked.
T265 remained silent, her mind torn between two realities. In one, she becomes favored and safe where the other she is accepted and sheltered. It burned how much she wanted to choose to be favored.
It was easy to stab to EmCee in the back and justify if with her own survival. It was EmCee’s smile though, the brightness of hope in it that made T265 hesitate. Perhaps, there was another way.
“What do we do now?”
“Leave that to me.”
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